Learning How to Forget Someone You Loved

  A sad man with his hand on his head

If you need to know how to forget someone, you first have to understand how moving on works.

The reason why love is not just exciting but also scary is there’s always the possibility of getting hurt.

With heartbreak comes the desperation to figure out how to forget someone and end the pain, but everybody knows it’s not always easy. Just because someone hurt you doesn’t mean you can turn off your emotions right away.

In order to move on properly and develop healthy coping mechanisms, you have to understand how healing a broken heart really works.

How Long Does It Take to Get Over a Breakup?

The question of how long to get over a breakup tends to have different answers. It will depend on many factors, including how long the couple was together and how the breakup itself went down.

A person’s capacity to process their emotions is another thing to take into account. If you’re used to dealing with complicated feelings, then you’re likely to handle a breakup better than some.

Healing from heartbreak is also difficult because of the feelings involved. The greater your emotional investment, the longer it takes to accept that things are over. When a couple separates, they also have to deal with the changes their breakup will cause in their lives.

It’s even harder without proper closure. You’ll be left wondering if there’s still hope to fix things or if it’s time for you to let go.

Moving on Has Different Aspects

To move on from a breakup is to understand both your motivations and the best method that will work for you.

It doesn’t begin right away with learning how to forget someone and starting a new chapter in your life. You have to examine your situation closely and set realistic expectations.

How to Get Over Someone Quickly

This is usually what someone with a broken heart wants to know: how to get over a breakup fast.

They say people who move on quickly either didn’t really love their partner or checked out of the relationship a long time ago. After all, you don’t give up on someone if you genuinely want to be with them, right?

It’s not always that simple, but if you still love your ex, you’ll need to come to terms with the fact that you may not be able to move on right away.

To get started on your road to recovery, you first have to accept that your relationship is over. Denying reality and holding on to false hope will only drag things on and make it harder for you to heal.

You also have to acknowledge your feelings instead of burying them or pretending to be unaffected. Instead of moving on quickly, the reality of your situation can come crashing down on you when you least expect it.

But even though there’s no schedule or formula that dictates how long to get over a relationship breakup, there are still ways to make sure you don’t get stuck in limbo for a long time.

How to Forget Someone Who Hurt You

Another reason why moving on can be difficult is because of the pain your ex caused you.

Rather than learning how to forget someone, you’ll be pushed toward taking revenge instead. This will only make things worse and give you an even harder time processing your breakup the right way.

So if the person you’re trying to remove from your life is someone who really broke your heart, you have to avoid focusing on your pain and anger. Don’t let negative emotions be your driving force.

You have to accept the fact that it’s not all your fault and that you didn’t deserve to get hurt. Stop trying to justify their actions or think of ways to punish them. Instead, find out how you can manage your heartbreak with a healthy coping mechanism.

After all, the opposite of love isn’t hate. It’s indifference.

The day you can look at the person who hurt you and feel nothing is when you know you’ve truly moved on.

How to Fall out of Love with Someone

This is the part of moving on that more people need to focus on.

You just don’t forget someone right away without actually going through the process of falling out of love with them. Most of the time, your feelings are the ones making it difficult for you to let go of the memories.

It isn’t always easy since no one can really control their feelings, but you have to face it head on to come out on the other side.

You can start by putting distance between you and the person you’re trying to forget. Don’t spend all your time thinking about them or finding out what they’re up to. You need to disengage and give yourself the space to have a life outside of the relationship that ended.

How to Forget Someone You Love Who Doesn’t Love You

Unrequited love is one other factor that makes learning how to forget someone more challenging.

Just because you weren’t technically together doesn’t mean your feelings weren’t real. It also doesn’t invalidate your pain when the person you love rejects you or tells you they just don’t feel the same way.

To start moving on, you need to accept the fact that these things happen. Sometimes, you will fall for someone who won’t be able to reciprocate. It doesn’t mean that you’re unlovable or you don’t deserve a good partner.

You also have to avoid blaming the person you love. Just as you can’t control how you feel, they’re also not at fault for not loving you.

A man lying on a couch by the telephone and holding paper shaped like a broken heart

Blaming yourself or other people will never help you learn how to forget someone you love who doesn't love you.

So How Long Does Heartbreak Last​?

The fact is, nobody really knows how long the effects of a breakup should last.

Even more difficult to quantify is how long it takes for a broken heart to heal. People have to deal with different situations and several factors can also come into play. How others coped and moved on won’t necessarily be the way it will happen for you.

It’s also not healthy to fixate just on figuring out how to forget someone you don’t want to think about anymore.

The best way to deal with heartbreak is still by giving yourself the chance to heal. Don’t nurture negative emotions or any desire to hurt others the way they hurt you.

To stop unwanted memories from continuing to hurt you, you have to reach a point where remembering them no longer causes you pain.