First Date Advice to Help You Overcome the Nerves

In need of useful first date advice? We got you. All you need are tried and tested ones.

Why do people search for first date advice?

Most importantly, why do you?

Everyone knows how exciting and nerve-wracking first dates can be. With that comes the pressure to do things right.

And as if the nerves aren’t enough, here’s another sobering fact: not all first dates are equal. No matter how many times you’ve gone through it, each story is different—good or bad. There’s no telling how they’ll go.

We know how stressful first dates can be. Did you choose the right place? Is your outfit appropriate? How do you even act?

Many questions are ringing in your head, and we feel you. We’ve been there and then some.

To help you start off on the right foot, we’ve gathered tips that have stood the test of time.

How Should You Treat First Date Rules?

Before presenting our list of first date advice, here’s a friendly reminder:

You may have read all the dating tips the internet has to offer. You know which subjects to dodge and which habits to ditch. The point is that unwritten dating rules have existed since time immemorial.

But they don’t exist in a strict or hard-and-fast sense.

People date differently because of various circumstances and philosophies. Treat these “rules,” so to speak, as general principles. Think of them like well-meaning friends looking out for you.

So when you read this entry, consider this as all-around first date advice for guys and ladies. You can use this compilation and make it a reference point as you put your spin on the application.

How to Prepare for Your First Date

Look your best, plan engaging conversation topics, and ensure you arrive on time. You likely already know these are must-dos, so we won’t dwell on them.

Instead, let us tell you about one of the deciding factors of your first date’s success or failure: the location.

Locations are tone-setters, and great first dates require focus. Achieving that means picking an unassuming place that provides a comfortable atmosphere.

Avoid venues with many distractions, such as sports bars and nightclubs. Instead, go somewhere without the frills, such as simple hole-in-the-wall restaurants.

Your chosen place should also be well-lit. This makes eye contact (an important part of connection-building, by the way) easier for both parties. As trendy as dimly lit places are, it’s best to stick to safe bets here.

Finding a good date location is a trial-and-error process. You won’t always hit the mark the first time, so learn as you go.

There’s a reason every compilation of first date advice for guys and ladies emphasizes the importance of location.

What to Do on the First Date

We know the nerves and anxiety are creeping in. Believe us—we’ve been there. But don’t press the panic button just yet. Get yourself together and put these tips to the test:

#1: Don’t overthink things.

We know it’s easy to get in your own head. Outcomes are uncertain, but you shouldn’t stress yourself too much. Let things play out naturally, and don’t force anything.

Stick to simple plans, and don’t put all your eggs in one basket. First dates aren’t always magical right from the jump, and people don’t always leave amazing first impressions. Enjoy the dates for what they are and embrace the moment.

#2: Temper your expectations.

Don’t expect mind-blowing chemistry right off the bat. More often than not, it takes time to build connections. Keep your expectations realistic, and don’t lie to yourself.

The what-ifs will always be there, but don’t let those dark clouds hover forever. You need to let them go at some point. Bad dates will happen from time to time, along with the good ones.

#3: A little awkwardness is normal.

You can especially feel this if you and your match are total strangers. You might’ve grown to hate this awkwardness. But conversations don’t always flow naturally. Take it on the chin and carry on.

This awkwardness also happens even if you and your match have established familiarity. You’re getting to know each other in a romantic context, and that transition won’t always be as smooth as you’d hope.

#4: Embrace the bright spots.

Watch out for potential red flags, but don’t ignore the green ones. Having your guard up doesn’t mean being ice cold. You’ll have a better dating experience when you appreciate your match for who they are. Don’t look for something (or someone) that isn’t there.

Think of good questions to ask your date for better conversations.

#5: Ask questions.

This should be a given, yes? But a friendly reminder won’t hurt.

Prepare good questions to ask your date well before the event. While we’re sure your match is doing their homework on this, don’t leave them to do the heavy lifting during conversations. You should do your part, too.

Your questions shouldn’t feel like a job interview checklist. Matches aren’t candidates. Choose ones that compel them to go beyond surface-level responses.

#6: Skip the booze as much as possible.

It’s tempting to drown your nerves with alcohol. But hear us out: you may want to put that bottle down. Liquor can cloud judgment, especially when taken in excess. Impaired logic leads to one bad decision after another, and you don’t want that.

Should you down some booze, keep it to one or two drinks. The point is, don’t go near or past your limit.

If you still want to keep drinking, switch and stick to non-alcoholic mixes the rest of the way.

#7: As always, be yourself.

How can you date someone and expect things to go well between you if you’re putting up pretenses the whole way through?

First dates can make even the most confident folks feel self-conscious. However, that doesn’t mean you should be somebody you’re not.

Like everyone else, you have unique things to offer to the table. You may not be for everyone, but you are for someone. That right there is why authenticity is a high-value trait.

#8: Remember to follow up.

Did your date go as well as you hoped? Great! Don’t forget to follow up as soon as possible.

Message them to let them know you had a blast. It doesn’t have to be novel-like; a short and sweet one will suffice. This will save them from being up all night, thinking of what-ifs. Make them happier by referencing something that happened on your first date. That bonus point may even land you a second date.

…

Our list doesn’t contain groundbreaking first date advice, but it works like a charm to increase your odds of success.