How to Approach a Lady You're Interested In

Want to leave a lasting impression? Know how to approach a lady with confidence and ease.

No matter how confident or experienced you are, certain approaches just don’t work with everyone.

You may know how to approach a lady online, but will the same strategy work in person? What if she responds differently alone compared to if she were with friends?

While there are some clever ways to approach a girl without seeming creepy or arrogant, there are a few nuances to consider.

This way, not only are you making it a safe and comfortable encounter for the lady you’re approaching, but also a continued learning experience for yourself.

Now, not to sound philosophical or ironic, but to know how to approach a lady, you must first know how to talk to one.

A man’s charm can only get him so far. If he has nothing substantial to say, do you think a lady will spend an extra few seconds to let him gather his thoughts?

How to Talk to Women

The difference between talking to women you’re friends with or related to by blood and women you fancy is obviously that with the latter, you’re bound to be more nervous and conscious about yourself.

But believe it or not, this helps a lot in identifying which areas of your appearance and personality you may need to work on.

If you’re having trouble talking to women you like, nothing beats a good amount of practice. And who do you practice with? Women you’re friends with.

It can also be colleagues, siblings, relatives, or strangers you’re not necessarily attracted to (it doesn’t hurt to make friends, right?).

With enough practice, you can feel a little more relaxed when approaching a lady you’re interested in.

Other important factors to consider:

• Do you know what you’re going to say to her?

• What is the goal? To ask her out or to get her number?

• Check her body language. Does she look like she doesn’t want to be disturbed?

• Pay attention to cues and know when to leave.

• Don’t be cute. Avoid questions like:

  1. What is a pretty woman like you doing all alone?

  2. Is your boyfriend around?

  3. You look bored. Do you want to get out of here?

Interesting Topics to Talk About

Can’t think of interesting topics to talk about? Pay attention to your surroundings.

Even if you know how to approach a lady, there’s no way to know if the interaction will last for two seconds or the entire evening. If you manage to hold a conversation long enough that you end up finding even more things to talk about, then that means two things:

You were successful in your approach.

You’re even better at making a lady feel comfortable talking to you.

In that case, you’re off to a great start. But if you’re having trouble figuring out how to hold a conversation with a lady, here are some interesting topics you can bring up.

1. Recent or upcoming events in your area.

   Why not? If you feel like the small talk went well, you can move things forward to see if she is interested in getting to know you more or hanging out.

2. Extend the small talk.

   Is she reading a book or sketching in her drawing pad? Use that as a conversation starter. Later on, you can branch out to similar topics. Maybe you read the same book before or have been planning to. Or you used to take art classes back in college.

   Just be careful not to make it all about you. Find the right balance between talking a bit about yourself and asking her questions so she knows you’re interested to hear what she has to say.

   At this point, you should be able to gauge how comfortable she is chatting with you. Again, pay attention to social cues such as body language, eye contact, and even her choice of words. If she seems unengaging, it’s probably because she wants to be left alone.

3. Find similarities.

   Learn to backtrack on certain details she mentioned to prolong the conversation.

   For instance, while she was talking about the book she was reading, she mentioned something about how a particular film reminds her of the story. If you happen to have seen that film, tell her and share your thoughts on it.

   You can also use other cues. Is she wearing running shoes and you happen to be in a run club? Is her laptop bag the same as yours? Does her t-shirt remind you of a musician or movie?

4. Your surroundings.

   If you can’t find any similarities, look around instead. Is there a baby crying nearby and it seems to be annoying to everyone else? Does the food at the cafe taste really good? Are they playing heavy metal in the background?

   Don’t be afraid to point out things that you see or hear. They can be good conversation starters when assessing how to approach a lady in a casual manner.

5. Give her a compliment or recommendation.

   Do you like the shoes she’s wearing? Let her know. Did she mention that she’s looking for a good restaurant she can take her parents to? If you know of a place, tell her.

Again, don’t be afraid to leave when it seems like there is nothing more to add to the conversation. Even if you missed your chance at asking for her number or whether she wants to hang out sometime, at least you can leave with a sense of confidence and dignity.

Another upside, it will be added practice on your part. So as they say, better luck next time.

How to Approach a Lady with Ease

Some men think that knowing how to approach a girl confidently means that you can date any girl you like. In a lot of cases, that’s true. But it’s not a one-way trick you can just pull out of a hat.

We’ve established that there is more to approaching women, and that’s by knowing what to say to them and how to hold a conversation.

So you had a great opening line. It was a hit! Now, what?

Don’t just come up with random stuff to talk about either. Unless you can see into the future and know for sure that your approach is going to be successful, stick to the aforementioned tips.

However, keep in mind that they’re not guaranteed to always work. But as mentioned, with practice, you’ll know what works and what doesn’t. As long as you’re mindful of your timing and surroundings, you’ll have better chances at knowing how to approach a lady with ease.