How can I tell if someone I meet on an online dating site might be a romance scammer?

Romance scammers use manipulative tactics to gain your trust and affection, often by being overly charismatic to appear trustworthy [1]. A significant red flag is **'love bombing,'** which involves giving excessive compliments very early in the relationship, pressuring you to reciprocate [2]. Scammers also commonly engage in **'catfishing,'** where they create fake profiles and personas using stolen pictures and information [3]. Once they have your affection, they may manipulate you into doing favors or asking for money, often with a fabricated sob story, such as needing funds for hospital bills [4]. Be very cautious if anyone you meet online asks for money, as this is a strong indicator of a scam [5, 6]. The overarching rule is to **never immediately trust anyone you meet on dating apps or sites** [7].

What is 'love bombing,' and why is it a red flag in online dating?

**Love bombing is a manipulative tactic** used by scammers to quickly gain your trust and affection [2]. It involves **giving excessive compliments and flattery, often pressuring you to feel obligated to return their intense affection** [2]. Scammers frequently target individuals who are insecure, as they may perceive the love bombing as validation, which they crave [2]. To protect yourself, it's crucial to be logical: **ask yourself why someone would shower you with so many compliments when you barely know each other** [2]. While compliments are not inherently bad, an excessive amount early on is a definitive red flag, and you should not let random flattery deceive you [2].

How can I verify the identity of an online dating match to avoid 'catfishing'?

If an online dating match seems too good to be true, they are likely a **catfisher** [4]. To verify their identity and ensure you're speaking to a genuine person, you should **perform a reverse image search using their profile pictures to check their origin** [4]. Additionally, **request a video call** with them to confirm you are interacting with the person shown in their profile [4]. A legitimate individual who is not a scammer should have no issues fulfilling these simple requests [4]. It's essential to **take all the time you need to get to know someone better**, and consider asking for their social media profiles to further confirm their identity [7].

What should I do if someone I'm dating online, especially someone from another country, asks me for money?

If anyone you are dating online, regardless of their purported origin, **starts asking for money, it is a strong indication that they are a scammer** [5, 8]. Scammers are highly motivated to obtain money and will fabricate elaborate stories, such as needing funds for hospital bills or travel, to elicit your financial help [4]. A specific tactic mentioned is the 'Nigerian Prince Scam,' where they claim to need a fee to access a large sum of money or 'royal treasure,' promising to share it with you, only to disappear once you send the funds [5, 6]. To avoid this, **you should simply ignore requests for money** [6]. Be practical: **a legitimate individual, especially a 'prince,' would not be contacting you for money** [6]. Remember, the general rule is to **never trust anyone immediately you meet on dating apps or sites**, particularly when financial requests arise [7].

What are the most crucial general safety tips for finding a serious relationship through online dating, especially for an older adult?

The most important safety rule in online dating, especially for older adults who may be more susceptible to scams, is to **never trust anyone you meet on dating apps or sites immediately** [7, 8]. You should **take all the time you need to genuinely get to know them** [7]. Be highly aware of common scammer tactics: **'love bombing'** (excessive flattery) [2], **'catfishing'** (fake profiles) [3], and attempts to direct you to **sketchy or fake dating websites** [9]. A critical red flag is **any request for money**, regardless of the sob story [4-6]. To protect yourself, always perform a **reverse image search on their photos** and **insist on a video call** to verify their identity [4]. Your **awareness of these manipulative tactics is your best defense** in the online dating space [7, 8].

How to Avoid Romance Scams | Online Dating Safety

Scams are craftier than ever. Learn how to avoid romance scams for a memorable online dating experience.

Just when you thought you'd found the love of your life online, think again! You might be a victim of a romance scam.

The prospect of finding a potential partner might excite older people who venture into the online dating world. It's convenient, usually free, and the dating pool is virtually limitless.

But a word of caution: Be careful when it comes to using dating apps and sites. Scammers can be found in unexpected places, and online dating is no exception.

Romance scams, as they are famously known, have been around since the inception of online dating. They come in different forms: Catfishing, blackmailing, and love bombing, among others.

They plague the online dating scene with their manipulative tactics, often victimizing older adults who seem desperate for love.

Despite countless dating app services ramping up their security, scammers are still able to bypass their defenses—all the more reason for you to be on guard.

So what should you do?

You need to learn how to avoid romance scams!

Recognize a Romance Scammer’s Tactics

Think of romance scammers as salesmen trying to sell you something. To get you to buy their product, they will butter you up and make you feel good with their charisma. They do so to get on your good side and make them seem trustworthy.

Unbeknownst to you, that’s a big red flag!

But how will you know if they’re trying to scam you? Here’s how scammers scam their victims:

Love Bombing

Love bombing is a manipulative tactic used by people to gain a person’s trust and affection by giving excessive compliments, pressuring their victims to feel the need to reciprocate.

A scammer will try to love bomb their victims, especially those insecure about themselves. Insecure victims are easy prey because they see love bombing as a form of validation, which is something they crave.

HOW TO AVOID

Avoid love bombing simply by being logical. Ask yourself, why would someone over-compliment you when you barely know each other? Compliments aren’t wrong per se, but too much is a red flag. Don’t let a random person fool you with their flattery.

Sketchy Sites / Fake Dating Apps

Scammers nowadays are not just a one-man army—they can be an underground group of professionals. Aside from the usual scammer accounts on dating apps, fraudsters often go to great lengths to create fake sites that allow them to steal a visitor’s information.

On some fake dating sites, developers create chatbots that mimic how real people respond. These are used to keep visitors from leaving, often baiting them to pay for features they don’t need.

HOW TO AVOID

There are many verified and legitimate dating sites for you to visit. Don’t be discouraged if you aren’t getting any matches on these sites. At least you know you are not being scammed. Longevity is one sign a site or app is authentic. You can also check for reviews or testimonials.

Catfishing

Have you ever met a beautiful woman online who turned out to be different in person? That’s a catfish!

They create fake profiles and personas, using other people’s pictures and information. However, not all catfishers are scammers—some just want love and validation because of their insecurities.

However, some catfishers do scam people. They’ll make you fall in love with their persona, and once they’ve got you wrapped around their finger, they’ll manipulate you and ask you for favors.

They might also tell you a sob story about needing money for hospital bills, and because you’ve fallen in love with their persona, you eventually give in to their request, no matter how absurd.

HOW TO AVOID

If someone you are talking to seems too good to be true, they are likely a catfisher. What you should do is do a reverse search using their pictures to verify its source. You can also request a video call with them to ensure you are talking to the same person on their profile. Someone who is not a scammer shouldn’t have any problems with this simple request.

If you meet people asking for money online, chances are they’re scammers.

The Nigerian Prince Scam

This is a kind of advance fee scam. The scammer's goal is to make you pay a fee for them to obtain some kind of royal treasure that they are willing to share with you once they get hold of it.

Victims often trust these scammers because they are good at pretending to be a Nigerian prince. Money is not a problem for them, so you expect them to fulfill their end of the bargain.

However, once you send them the fee that will allow them to access their riches, they disappear and ghost you, taking your money with them.

HOW TO AVOID

These scams are usually done through email. To avoid them, simply ignore their emails or messages. Be practical. Why would some Nigerian prince even contact you in the first place? Don’t click on these kinds of emails because they might come with a Trojan or virus that can steal your information.

Awareness Helps You Avoid Romance Scams

Romance scams have ruined countless lives all over the world. Scammers will do anything to get money.

Over the years, older people have had the highest rate of being scammed, mostly because they aren’t as knowledgeable with technology as younger people, and also because at their age, they are understandably more desperate for love.

Scammers are becoming more innovative and tricky. With the evolution of technology, scammers’ tactics evolve accordingly.

If you think you’re smart enough to fend off a scammer, think again. Scammers are always two steps ahead of you. Why would they engage in scams if they don’t have a backup plan?

Knowing how to navigate the online dating space is your best protection against these romance scams.

Remember one important rule in online dating: Never trust anyone you meet on dating apps or sites. At least not immediately. Take all the time you need to get to know them better. Stalk them if you have to. Ask for their social media. Jump on a video call with them. What’s important is that you don’t wear your heart on your sleeve.

Online dating can be messy, especially for those who don’t know how to avoid romance scams, but with these tips at your disposal, online dating is more than worth a try.

External References:

Moura, Nelson. “Major international anti-scam operation nets 1,858 arrests across Asia.” 4 June 2025, http://agbrief.com/news/south-east-asia/04/06/2025/major-international-anti-scam-operation-nets-1858-arrests-across-asia/.

“Philippine authorities arrest more than 400 people in suspected cybercrime hub.” AP News, 27 February 2025, https://apnews.com/article/philippines-online-scams-14bf35c3ad881117ba3223123c7a65bc Accessed 10 June 2025.

“Romance Scams — FBI.” FBI, https://www.fbi.gov/how-we-can-help-you/scams-and-safety/common-frauds-and-scams/romance-scams Accessed 10 June 2025.