Protect Yourself from Falling for a Romance Scam
Don’t let a romance scam turn your life upside down.
Countless daters are on dating apps and websites. When they meet someone, their first instinct is to initiate communication. After all, that’s how people get to know each other.
But this can go two ways. One, they’ll find real romance. The more matches interact, the closer they become and enter a relationship.
Or two, they’ll fall victim to a romance scam. Just as there are online dating success stories, there are also horror stories of people thinking they’ve found love, only to be used and depleted of their life’s savings.
Unfortunately, this still happens even with the wealth of information on the Internet. The Federal Trade Commission reported that scammers defrauded 70,000 Americans in 2022, leading to an estimated $1.3 billion in losses.
With that said, how can daters protect themselves from romance scams? Let this guide be your resource.
Deconstructing a Romance Scam
This type of scam involves manipulating people by feigning romantic intentions. Expressing false affections can lure victims in, making them believe something real is happening. Once scammers establish trust, they exploit their unsuspecting matches for monetary gain.
These scammers execute their plans through fake identities. These profiles help create believable illusions, complete with photographs to make them appear more convincing. With many users scattered across the platform, telling them apart from real people can be challenging.
As they carry out their scams, scammers want to keep the wheels moving fast. They want to build relationships quickly because they believe it’ll help them evade suspicion.
If you think this only happens on dating sites that are scams in disguise, you may want to change that. These schemes happen on reputable platforms, too. This is why you can never be too careful when dating online.
Types of Romance Scams
There isn’t just one type of scam. All may have the same goal of manipulating victims, but they have different means of execution.
Below are some of the well-known varieties:
Blackmail
When dating online, you expect your conversations to remain confidential. However, blackmailers don’t care about that. They take advantage of your trust and leverage their knowledge for their gain.
Through this tactic, scammers manipulate their victims through threats like sending nude photos and other private information.
Pro-Dating
Will a romance scammer meet you in person?
Some scammers don’t hide behind their screens. Others go on real dates with their matches. But instead of building genuine connections, they use their dates as ruses for exploitation. For example, they ask you to go to a fancy restaurant and let you pay the entire bill.
More often than not, pro-dating requires a team to carry out. Scammers rope in translators and drivers and convince them to exact heavy charges. They plan dates in their favor to compel matches to spend more.
Love Bombing
Have you ever encountered something too good to be true? That’s what love bombing feels like. You get bombarded with sweet and thoughtful messages, making you feel appreciated. The more this happens, the more they gain your trust.
Once that trust is there, scammers will use it to make you dependent on them and manipulate you into doing their bidding.
Inheritance
This tactic relies on the power of storytelling.
Scammers convince their victims they’ll receive a large inheritance and require them to shell out costs they currently can’t afford. Some may even claim they need to get married to gain said inheritance.
Through this setup, you might believe your relationship will last forever and that you can benefit from the money.
Unfortunately, scammers pull a fast one and ask their victims to shoulder false expenses. They keep every single purchase and leave them hanging.
No two romance scams are alike, and scammers might switch tactics now and then.
Military Impersonations
Did you know this is a common romance scam tactic? Military men are often stationed overseas, and fraudsters leverage the long distance to further their exploits.
The internet scammer poses as a soldier or other military personnel through a new fake identity or total impersonation.
After developing a relationship with their chosen victim from a distance, scammers claim they can’t access their funds because of their current setup. If not, they’ll say they need financial help. The truth is, fraudsters here aren’t looking for assistance. They instead want to steal money.
Code Verification
For this last tactic, let’s switch gears a bit. If the previous acts were direct actions, this one is passive.
Instead of treating relationships as ATMs, scammers who use this tactic use them to siphon information. Such details include apps, account numbers, passwords, and other personal credentials.
Once they get the information they need from you, they pretend to be platforms you use, sending fake verification codes. When you click the link, you’re directed to a page where you have to input your personal details. Upon submission, scammers collect them and proceed with their exploitation.
Signs of a Romance Scammer
Scammers are a clever bunch. And with that, you should be ten steps ahead of them as they spread themselves around. Detecting fraudsters can be challenging, but these signs should help you single them out:
1. Quick movement
Do you feel things are moving too fast between you and your match? If the speed isn’t to your liking, perhaps the other person on the line is rushing your connection to check their agendas. The quicker they move towards their objective, the sooner they can end their ruse.
2. Emergency claims
Let’s say your match tells you they have an emergency and need your help. While you want to get up and do something, your gut says something’s off. And more often than not, man’s intuition is correct.
Your match may be a scammer waiting for an opening. Their timing gives you little time to think clearly. Don’t fall into their trap and give them ammo.
3. Blurry backstories
Couples normally tell each other their history, even if they leave some details out. While that’s normal, inconsistencies aren’t. You know something’s up when your match’s details contradict each other. It’s even more telling when they justify it with more lies.
4. Suspicious transactions
Doing favors is one thing. Facilitating transactions is another. If they ask you to transact with others, take that as a red flag and ask for help immediately, especially when it involves receiving or transferring money on their behalf.
5. Avoidance of meet-ups
If you and your match have had a virtual arrangement, you’d naturally want to meet offline. If they keep refusing or making up excuses to get out of in-person dates, you may have a problem on your hands.
Stay on Your Toes
Scammers can fool even the most cautious daters. While you should have fun on your romantic adventures, always remember to keep your guard up. You won’t truly know who’s on the other side of the line. It’s better to be safe than to become a romance scam victim.
Reference
Stouffer, Clare. 2022. “Romance Scams: What You Need to Know Plus Online Dating Scam Statistics.” Norton. https://us.norton.com/blog/online-scams/romance-scams.