The Anatomy of Romance Scams on Instagram: How They Operate

Low Number of Posts

A dating scammer's pictures are used to avoid suspicion and establish their profile as someone legitimate.

However, you’ll often notice that there’s no natural buildup of posts about daily activities, friends, or personal interests. This is because a profile with too much content may draw more attention. By keeping their profiles simple, they hope to appear genuine and even a little mysterious.

They do this to control the narrative and avoid having a digital history that contradicts their fabricated persona.

Missing Profile Picture

The first thing we see when we navigate someone’s profile is their display picture. Without one, you can assume that the person is not invested in their profile or is reluctant to be readily recognized.

An account without a profile picture may be brand-new or may have had its original image deleted for breaking the rules. Some users may have new accounts and prefer not to share photos publicly. They can also experience technical difficulties.

While not always malicious, the lack of a profile picture may also be used as a ploy to spark interest and encourage direct messaging, where the scam artist can attempt to create a phony sense of intimacy through chat.

It can also mean that since they don’t have a photo you can trace, it’s easier for them to implement their scams online.

Unverified Account

Verification connects an account to a genuine identity. To avoid being discovered or held responsible for their fraudulent actions, scammers prefer to stay anonymous. An unverified account helps them keep more distance.

While a blue checkmark can add credibility, its absence does not automatically scream "Instagram dating scams," especially to those unfamiliar with Instagram's verification system. Scammers exploit this ambiguity.

It's crucial to look for a combination of red flags when assessing the legitimacy of an Instagram account. When an unverified account is combined with other questionable signs, it should raise some concerns.

New Account with Few Followers

Building a good Instagram following naturally requires time and regular interaction. Someone with a newly created account usually hasn’t had enough time or engagement to have a lot of followers.

Romance scammers on Instagram prioritize private interactions through direct messages to build emotional connections and manipulate their victims. They don’t necessarily require a large public following to achieve this goal.

This type of reduced digital footprint makes it more difficult for potential victims to investigate the person and find inconsistencies or evidence of a scam.

Use of Love Bombing and Fake Vulnerabilities

Love bombing and sharing fake vulnerabilities are two of the most effective scammer methods to quickly win over a victim's trust and weaken their defenses.

This intense attention makes you feel incredibly wanted and validated. The "bond" you form can be intoxicating and give you the impression that you have found your soulmate.

By the time romance scams on Instagram reach the part where they request money or other favors, you may be emotionally invested and less likely to question the situation critically, fearful of losing the intense connection you believe you’ve found.

Asking for Personal Information Too Soon

Scammers seek to create a sense of control over the relationship by obtaining a lot of personal information. As you gradually divulge more details about yourself, you feel more vulnerable and reliant on them, since they now have a piece of your private life.

They do this early on as a test to see how quickly the victim will trust and share. The scammer can tell if the victim is more likely to be manipulated if they are willing to divulge such information.

Even seemingly harmless bits of sensitive information can serve as stepping stones for financial requests. For example, learning about your likes and dislikes can help them create a more sympathetic story when they start asking you for money later on.

Trying to Isolate You

Isolation allows scammers to control the information their victims receive. With it, they can carefully craft their narrative without fear of being challenged by someone who knows the victim or recognizes their scamming tactics.

They might say something like, “Our relationship is special to me. Let’s just keep it between us for now,” or “Your family or friends wouldn’t understand our connection.”

The intimate, private world that scammers create with their victims gives the impression that the relationship is unique and exclusive. This "bubble" hinders the victim's ability to take a step back and view the situation objectively.

Asking for Money

Romance scammers on Instagram ultimately ask for money because profit is their primary objective. The relationships they cultivate are a carefully crafted facade intended to manipulate and exploit their victims for monetary gain.

To make their demands seem more reasonable and difficult to turn down, they take advantage of weeks or months of emotional bonding and the victim's faith in the relationship. The victim will then feel compelled to assist their "partner" in need.

Scammers create believable stories to elicit empathy, which often involve them getting into an accident or a family member dealing with an emergency surgery, legal troubles, or travel funds.

Emotional Blackmail

Once a scammer has spent time and effort creating a fake relationship and gaining your trust and emotional investment, they do not want to lose control.

When they sense that you’re starting to become suspicious or hesitant about sending money, they resort to emotional blackmail, which can be a powerful tool to break down your resistance. They keep you tethered and compliant by using threats to end the relationship, harm themselves, or reveal "secrets."

These romance scammers commonly use the following emotional blackmail statements:

“If you don't trust me enough to send money, then maybe we're not meant to be together.”

“I don't know what I'll do if you don’t help me.”

“After everything and how much I care about you, I can't believe you won't help me with this.”

“If you betray me, I’ll expose everything you sent me.”

If you’re in this type of situation, we highly encourage you to report the account immediately to Instagram, as the app has a process for dealing with blackmail and harassment. They can ban accounts that violate their policies.

Most importantly, not complying with their demands is a crucial step in figuring out how to stop blackmail on Instagram. When you give in to a blackmailer's initial demand, you are essentially confirming that their tactic works.