**What are the specific risks of blackmail I should be aware of when dating online, especially when forming connections with women from other countries?**

When dating online, the thrill of connection can unfortunately lead to risks, with blackmail being a significant one [1]. This can occur after sharing personal information or intimate moments with someone you've met online, leading to suspicious demands and fear of exposure [2]. Reports of sextortion have increased globally, highlighting the importance of caution [1]. Be aware that blackmailers may exploit the trust built during online interactions to make demands, which can include financial requests or further sharing of explicit content [3].

**I've shared some private information with someone I met on a dating site who now threatens to expose it unless I pay them. What are the first steps I should take if I'm being blackmailed online?**

If you're being blackmailed online, **immediately collect and document all evidence** of communication, including text messages, emails, social media chats, and any other form of correspondence, ensuring timestamps and contact details are visible [4]. **Do not give them any money or other requested items** like cryptocurrency or gift cards, as this will likely escalate their demands and complicate potential legal proceedings [3]. **Cease all contact** with the blackmailer to eliminate their power to influence you and prevent them from using your words against you [5].

**If I am a victim of blackmail on an online dating platform, should I report this to the dating site itself, and what information should I include?**

**Yes, you should report the perpetrator to the online dating platform as soon as possible** [6]. Check the platform for review or reporting systems and don't hesitate to use them [6]. Your report allows the platform administrators to take action against suspicious accounts and can help prevent others from being targeted [6]. Include all documented evidence of the blackmail attempts and the blackmailer's profile information to aid their internal investigation [6].

**Is online blackmail illegal in the United States, and should I consider reporting it to law enforcement if I am being targeted?**

**Yes, blackmail is illegal under both federal and state law in the United States** [7, 8]. While every state has its own specific laws, it is often classified as extortion, and some states even have specific blackmail statutes [7]. If the blackmailer escalates their actions, **filing a police report is crucial** as it establishes an official record of the crime, which can be important for future legal proceedings. Law enforcement may also be able to provide resources and support for victims [8].

**Beyond reporting and ceasing contact, what other proactive steps can I take to protect myself if I've been a target of online blackmail?**

In addition to reporting and ceasing contact, it is crucial to **safeguard your online accounts** [8, 9]. Change your passwords immediately, enable two-factor or multi-factor authentication, monitor your account activity for any unauthorized access, and update your security questions and recovery information [9]. You may also consider creating a new email address or social media profile for added security [9]. Furthermore, while optional, **seeking legal help from an attorney with expertise in cybercrime** can provide guidance on your rights and potential legal actions, such as obtaining a Protective Order [9, 10].

What to Do About Blackmail When Dating Online: A Guide

Last updated: 5 May 2025 A man talking to someone on the phone

Understanding what to do about blackmail is crucial for anyone who uses the internet.

Have you ever received suspicious demands after sharing personal information or intimate moments with someone you met online? Are you living in fear of sensitive details being exposed and not knowing what to do about blackmail?

If you’re not careful, the thrill of connection and the prospect of finding someone special online can quickly turn into a nightmare. While online dating presents exciting opportunities, it also poses unique risks, one of the most devastating being blackmail.

A small comfort is the fact that you are not alone.

In fact, reports of sextortion have increased globally. Compared to 10,731 reports in 2022, the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children's (NCMEC) CyberTipline received 26,718 reports in 2023.

In hopes of combating such an awful trend, this guide aims to outline the immediate actions you must take to protect yourself and navigate this type of difficult situation.

Understanding your options and taking decisive action is the first step toward reclaiming your safety and peace of mind when trying to find love in this modern age.

What to Do When Someone Is Blackmailing You Online

Here’s a list of useful tips on what to do if you’re being blackmailed:

Collect and Document Evidence

Preserving evidence is critical when you are being blackmailed. It can help you protect yourself and bring the perpetrators to justice.

Keep copies of all the times you communicated with them, regardless of the medium. This includes text messages, emails, social media chats, conversations in messaging apps, audio or video recordings, and physical letters or notes.

Make sure the timestamps and contact details are visible when you take screenshots of your correspondence. In cases of physical letters or notes, store them properly and keep them in a secure place. Don’t let just anyone handle them to preserve any potential fingerprints from the perpetrator.

Do Not Give Them Money

You are strongly advised against ever paying a blackmailer.

There is no assurance that they will stop their threats and remove the existence of any compromising material that they claim to have. Money is also what gives them the confidence to escalate their efforts.

Additionally, while you are the victim, engaging in financial transactions with criminals may unintentionally complicate future legal proceedings.

Apart from cash, blackmailers may also demand that you invest in cryptocurrency, give them prepaid gift cards or online game credits, and even provide more explicit photos of yourself. There are many non-monetary demands that can still be exploitative.

Cease All Contact

Even though you might be tempted to compromise or pay to get them to stop, doing so usually results in more extortion. Even when you’re confused on what to do about blackmail, you shouldn’t be tempted to surrender to their manipulation.

Communication is what blackmailers thrive on. Every interaction you have with them allows them to further influence your actions and instill more fear. By cutting off contact, this power dynamic is eliminated.

Most importantly, you also prevent yourself from saying or doing something that might be construed or used against you, which could further complicate legal proceedings in the future.

Report to the Online Dating Platform

Check the online dating platform you’re using for any review systems that you can utilize. Do not hesitate to report the perpetrator as soon as you can. Reporting them allows the platform administrators to promptly take action against any suspicious accounts.

The platform may have its own internal investigative procedures, and if law enforcement becomes involved, site admins can give them information.

Your report also creates an official record of the incident in the platform's system, which can help prevent other users from being targeted in the future.

A man showing his phone to a group of people at a table

If you don’t know what to do if you’re being blackmailed, seeking advice from a trusted friend or family member can be a good first step.

Tell Someone You Trust

You do not have to go through this alone. Being a victim of online blackmail can be emotionally distressing, and you’re encouraged to discuss your experiences with people you trust.

Not only will having a solid support network benefit you, but you can also help your loved ones stay safe by educating them about your experiences.

Just make sure to emphasize the importance of discretion. Tell them to keep the information private, with the exception of reporting to the authorities or seeking professional assistance when necessary.

Report to the Authorities

You might have been hesitant and wondering, “Is blackmail against the law?” or “Is blackmailing illegal?”

The answer to both questions is yes.

According to the Shouse Law Group, blackmail is illegal under both federal and state law. Keep in mind that every state has its own laws regarding blackmail, but in many of them, blackmail is classified as general extortion. In some states, there’s even a specific blackmail statute.

In the event that the blackmailer escalates their actions, filing a police report establishes an official record of the crime, which may be crucial for future legal proceedings. Law enforcement may also be able to better help you find resources and support services for victims of these types of crimes.

Safeguard Your Online Accounts

It’s possible that a blackmailer obtained access to your social media or email account in order to communicate with you or steal compromising information without your knowledge.

Securing these accounts prevents any further unauthorized access.

To protect your online accounts, you can do the following: change your passwords immediately, enable two-factor authentication (2FA) or multi-factor authentication (MFA), monitor your account activity, update security questions or recovery information, and consider creating a new email address or social media profile.

Seek Legal Help

This is optional but highly recommended. Consulting a lawyer with expertise in cybercrime means you have someone who can advise you on your rights and the potential legal actions you can take.

They can assist you in asking the court for a Permanent Protection Order (PPO) or Temporary Restraining Order (TRO) against the blackmailer if you feel threatened.

Having legal counsel during a trying and stressful period can bring you some measure of comfort or peace of mind.

If you find yourself the victim of blackmail while navigating the online dating world, remember this: you are not alone, and you have the power.

Blackmail is a serious offense for which offenders face legal repercussions. By taking note of these guidelines on what to do about blackmail and taking decisive action, you can keep yourself safe and help make the internet safer for others.

Don't let your fear silence you. Ask for help, and remember that you deserve the chance to navigate the world of online dating without fear.

References:

Shouse, N. (2022). Is blackmail a crime? A defense lawyer explains. Shouse Law Group. https://www.shouselaw.com/ca/blog/is-blackmail-a-crime/

Vaughan, E. (2024). NCMEC Releases New Sextortion Data. National Center for Missing & Exploited Children. https://www.missingkids.org/blog/2024/ncmec-releases-new-sextortion-data