A Wake-up Call for You to Break up With Your Girlfriend
If you feel more drained and indifferent while being with your partner, those are signs that you probably need to break up with your girlfriend.
Judging by the article’s title, you’re probably here because your mind has been circling about how you need to break up with your girlfriend.
There’s no shame in that. Relationships face challenges, and it can be difficult to make decisions. Especially since you must always consider your partner in every choice. But what if the choice includes breaking free from the woman you love for good?
There’s also particular difficulty if the breakup is "clear," indicating no infidelity, conflict, or any obvious issue. The “spark” has just faded, and you’re overwhelmed with more questions than answers.
You may be in denial or think that love should always be unconditional. But now that you’re here, let’s ease your burden by pointing out the warning signs that you should break up with her sooner rather than later.
The Signs that Say You Must Break Up
Consider this as a kind of "should we break up quiz." If she checks at least half of the following boxes, have the guts to end the relationship:
You Two Want Different Things Out of Life
Sharing the same fundamental values and life goals is what fuels a relationship. If your values and plans differ to the point where a compromise isn't possible, there's no need to push it and risk burnout or worse.
One aspect of true love is letting go and allowing the person to be who they are. Breakups can offer a terrific chance for introspection and personal growth.
She Expects You to Financially Support Her In Every Way
Men, we know that society compels you to be the ultimate provider. However, we’d like to stress that it should be done in fairness. A relationship is a partnership between two people and partners are supposed to work through things together.
We all have limits, and telling your partner about yours does not make you any less of a man. Provide for her as much as you can, but it should never come at the expense of making her overly reliant on you. That’s far from fair. Especially if she’s irresponsible in managing finances.
You are Micromanaged Over Everything
Does she try to control everything you do, including who you talk to, when you need to go home, your hobbies, your bank account, and your social media accounts? If so, you do not have a girlfriend. You have a manager.
Your girlfriend should be someone who trusts you and allows you to be yourself, not someone who forces you to conform to all her expectations. A relationship is a delicate balance of trust and compromise. If either gets abused, you’re only setting yourself up for a destructive cycle.
She Fights You Over Petty Issues
Disagreements are normal in a relationship. However, having a pattern of fights over petty issues is not. For example, does she argue about who gets the last slice of pizza, who gets the remote control, who does the dishes, who takes out the trash, and why you accidentally stained her face while she was applying makeup?
These are minor issues that you can discuss calmly without raising your voice. If you’ve spent more days feeling like you’re walking on eggshells around her, you know the relationship is doomed to fail.
Your Needs are Often Dismissed
As much as you extend yourself to her, the effort must be mutual. When two people are in a relationship, they should be able to meet each other's needs. So, if your girlfriend is all about receiving and never giving, there’s a problem.
Being heard and valued in a relationship is what cements a bond, not how long you two are together. For example, reaching a bronze anniversary is not as exciting if it means eight years of being someone’s doormat.
Time Spent With Her Doesn’t Feel Good
What is the point of being in a relationship if you can’t stand being in the same room with her, let alone spending a day together? You might want to sit down and ask yourself why you’re still with this person.
It’s best to be honest with yourself, even if it means facing your deepest fears and anxieties. A relationship won’t thrive if you keep sweeping things under the rug just to “keep the peace.”
You Think About Breaking Up a Lot
“Should I split up with my girlfriend?”
Has this question been popping in your head for a long while now? That is because there are already moments that you recognize as red flags (they could be yours or hers), and you are not ready to fully confront them. But you have to.
It is unfair for both of you to delay ending things when it is already hurting you both. Sometimes, it’s best to just rip the band-aid off and get it over with.
What Are the Best Ways to Break Up?
How to break up with someone you still love can be done by simply being honest and kind.
Perhaps the results above reinforced your choice to finally end your relationship. Here’s how to break up with someone you still love in a dignified manner:
Break Up in Person
Are you thinking of sending them a breakup text? Despite the fact that sending a breakup text seems much simpler, we urge you to reconsider. Separating with someone through chat or text only makes you appear rude.
Breakups are difficult to deal with, but the least you can do is express it in person. This further demonstrates how much you cherished your relationship and how much you respect your soon-to-be ex.
Break Up Somewhere Private
This is another important thing to consider. In a breakup, when you and your partner are at your most vulnerable, the best place to have it is in a private location where no one can pass by and exploit the situation for gossip.
As much as possible, have it in a place where it’s only the two of you, so you’re both free from distractions and you can freely express what you want to say.
Explain Yourself Calmly
We know breakups can trigger a lot of emotions, but try to calm yourself down. You can take a few moments for yourself before speaking with her to help you relax.
Always remember that how you deliver a message matters a lot. There could be moments where your partner raises their voice, but you don’t have to mirror them to assert yourself.
Allow Her to Speak
Just because you initiated the breakup does not mean she cannot talk back. Never assume what the other person is going through, even though you’ve been together for years.
Give her space to talk, express her feelings, or even cry if needed. If you think things are difficult for you, think about how much harder it feels being broken up with.
Now that you’ve reached the end of the article, whether you’re about to break up with your girlfriend or not, we sincerely hope these suggestions are of help. Never forget to keep your heart and mind happy and content, even if it means being single.