Bridge the Distance: Provide Reassurance in a Relationship

Make Time Organically–Not Forcefully

One of the many issues a couple faces when living far from each other is the difference in time and schedule. They have priorities of their own and other personal needs that require more attention.

Many so-called “dating gurus” will advise you to a set number of calls per day, a fixed amount of virtual dates, and whatever that requires you to make time with your partner. While it does make sense, there are better ways to make each interaction feel organic and not forced.

• Short and Frequent Messages

In a long-distance relationship, texts and chats are your most important tools for reassuring your partner. The main goal of sending your partner short and frequent messages is to show them that they are always on your mind without being pressured into a lengthy conversation. Short and snappy texts resonate with people, making them more engaged. The visual impact of a lengthy message creates an intimidating wall that feels overwhelming, while a slew of spontaneous short messages feels more engaging and inviting.

• Spontaneous Calls

Spontaneously calling your partner is an effective method of providing reassurance in a relationship. A quick phone call is a pleasant surprise that lets them know they are on your mind. Just remember to be mindful of their schedule; you don’t want to disturb them from their jobs or chores.

• Respect Each Other’s Time

While this isn’t a direct method of assurance, respecting each other’s boundaries and time is a vital part of building a healthy long-distance relationship. Giving reassurance in a relationship doesn’t mean you have to be in their space all the time; providing reassurance means you know what they’re doing, and you know when to enter their space.

Provide a Safe Space for Vulnerability

Being in an LDR can be frustrating; not everyone understands how grueling it can be waiting for your partner to come home or meet up halfway. Which is why providing each other a platform to vent out frustrations and loneliness is a good method of reassurance.

A couple that shares each other’s vulnerability creates a deeper, more authentic connection with each other. Pair it with reassurance, and your partner will likely feel less sad about the thought of being far apart.

If you want your partner to feel acknowledged and safe, here are a few ways to make them feel that they are not alone:

• Discard Any Misconceptions

Understandably, being in an LDR creates many misconceptions and insecurities. A common misconception they face is “being forgotten by your partner.” Partners, especially those left at home, develop this fear of being forgotten because they think that being away from each other for longer hours causes them to be put at the bottom of the priority list.

How you can reassure your partner of the misconceptions and fears they face is by being transparent with them. Tell them about everything that has happened, including your feelings of grief and loneliness, to the nature of your work.

• Let Your Partner Vent

Frustrations are like the carbonation of a soda; shake things up, and they’ll eventually burst. The buildup of emotional frustrations is caused by a couple’s geographical distance. A great way for your partner to feel reassured is by letting them express their feelings—no matter how painful it sounds.

There are so many feelings a person can feel at the moment, which leads them to become overwhelmed. According to Fearless Living, feelings want to be expressed—trying not to express your feelings comes with consequences. Allow your partner to express their grievances and loneliness. Giving them a safe space to vent their emotions provides proper reassurance in a relationship.

Words of Validation and Affirmation

Of the five love languages, “words of affirmation” is one of the most important love languages to use, especially in an LDR setting. As stated previously, the distance can create misconceptions, fears, and insecurities. An effective way to counter these is to provide your partner with validation and affirmation.

If you want your partner to feel validated and inspired to continue your relationship, consider these reassurance quotes for your relationship:

• Your feelings matter to me, and I understand them.
• I can see you’re making an effort, and I appreciate it.
• I understand your fears; I, too, fear the same. You’re not alone.
• You’re not alone in this; let’s face this together.
• Let’s hold on until we’re together again, okay?
• I completely trust you.
• I acknowledge the problems we have; let’s solve them together slowly.
• I don’t want you to be alone; I want to help you feel better.
• Your love inspires me to do better; you make things feel easier.
• You’re allowed to make mistakes; I will forgive you, especially in these times.

Reassurance can come from words of empowerment to endearing actions. Now that you know how to give reassurance in your relationship, it’s time to learn how to build a good relationship with your partner through practical, long-distance methods.

If you want to know how to build a good relationship, you first need to know how to give reassurance.

Open Communication

Communication is the cornerstone of every relationship, but for a long-distance setup, it’s a lifeline. While technology makes it easier to communicate, the quality of those conversations is more important.

To build open and proper communication with your partner, you need to actively listen to them.

How do you actively listen to your partner in a long-distance setting?

• Eliminate Distractions
While it’s normal for couples to multitask while talking on the phone, it’s best to avoid doing anything that distracts you from your partner. Stop whatever you’re doing and focus on talking to them, especially when they have something serious to share. This makes them feel heard and valued.
• Listen First, Comment Later
If there’s one thing partners don’t like, it's being cut off, especially if they’re trying to pour their heart out about frustrations. Always show respect by letting them speak first and make their point before you chime in. That way, your partner will feel seen and validated by allowing them to finish their point.
• Don’t Give Judgment Unless Asked
Sometimes your partner doesn’t want solutions; rather, they want to be heard. Listen to them with an open mind, even if you won’t agree with what they say. Don’t interject them with unsolicited opinions or advice. It’s better to be an ear than their mouthpiece. Doing this shows you respect your partner, assuring them that you are a safe space to vent.

Consistency Through Actions

While communication is a powerful method to give reassurance in a relationship, your actions will speak louder than what you say. To build a better, stronger connection, you must be consistent in your actions.

Why is consistency important? According to Hello Coach, being consistent shows that you’re capable of taking accountability, it builds credibility, fosters respect, and encourages honest and open communication.

While some find it difficult to be naturally consistent, people should welcome it as a challenge to prove that they indeed love their partner.