Are romance scams prevalent on online dating platforms where I might meet women from countries like the Philippines, Latin America, Thailand, China, Ukraine, or Russia?

Yes, unfortunately, romance scams are a significant issue on online dating platforms, and this risk extends to platforms where individuals seek international relationships [1-3]. The sources indicate that romance scams show no signs of slowing down, with substantial financial losses reported to the FTC [2]. Dating site scammers often lurk on dating apps and sites or social media—any platform that people often use to find matches—for unsuspecting prey [3]. It's crucial to be vigilant regardless of the platform you use to connect with potential partners.

How do romance scammers typically try to connect with individuals looking for marriage online, and what are some early warning signs I should be aware of?

Scammers often reach out to victims on relevant platforms and forge seemingly genuine connections through conversations and sweet messages [3]. Early warning signs to watch out for include inconsistent profiles , where details don't match across different platforms [4, 5]. Another red flag is quick confessions of love and overly affectionate messages early in the communication , as genuine feelings take time to develop [4]. Be wary of profiles that seem too good to be true or lack detailed information [4, 5].

What are some common tactics used by romance scammers to try and get money from their victims, especially if they know I might be interested in traveling to meet them?

A common tactic involves the scammer conjuring up a crisis or problem that requires financial assistance once they have established some trust [3]. They may claim to have an emergency, such as medical bills, travel issues, or legal problems, and ask for money [6]. If a match keeps asking for money, especially with a sense of desperation and using various excuses, it is a significant warning sign [6, 7]. Be particularly suspicious if they make promises related to meeting in person but then repeatedly have convenient excuses to avoid these meetups or request funds for travel expenses that never materialize [8]. Don’t fall for their trap, no matter how charismatic they are [7].

If someone I've met online expresses strong feelings quickly and then asks for financial help, are there other inconsistencies or unrealistic stories I should look for to confirm my suspicions of a romance scam?

Yes, besides quick declarations of love and financial requests, look for unrealistic stories that feel like soap operas with plot holes and contradictions [6]. The more a scammer talks, the more inconsistencies might emerge. Try asking for clarification or details about their stories to see if they can keep their narrative straight [6]. Also, pay attention to broken promises ; if they consistently fail to follow through on commitments, particularly regarding meeting in person or repaying supposed debts, this is a major red flag [8].

What are some proactive steps I can take to protect myself from romance scams while using online dating platforms to find a potential spouse?

To protect yourself, remember to not rule out the possibility that you are interacting with a scammer , regardless of how genuine they may seem [5]. Cross-check their profiles on various social media and dating platforms to ensure consistency in their photos and biographical information [5]. Be cautious of unusual requests for money or personal information [7]. Importantly, don't isolate yourself ; talk to trusted friends or family members about your online relationships, as they may notice red flags you might overlook [7]. You can also try to catch them in the act with a little test by asking specific questions or requesting more details about their lives [8].

Every Dater’s Guide to Romance Scam Detection

Woman learning Romance Scam Detection skills

Flex your romance scam detection muscles with this entry’s help.

As times change, so does dating. Some may have stuck with traditional practices, but many daters have switched to online dating.

Common reasons are the convenience and accessibility of dating apps and sites. Ironically, these same features make finding love in the digital world risky.

Romance scams show no signs of slowing down. According to the Federal Trade Commission (FTC), the estimated cumulative losses from romance scams for the first nine months of 2024 were $823 million among 42,399 victims.

While those aren’t the full figures, they should be enough to catch attention.

We can’t predict who we’ll encounter online, but we can be more vigilant as we meet various types of daters. Here’s how to improve your skills in romance scam detection.

Why Do Romance Scams Happen?

Online dating should be harmless fun. Unfortunately, scammers ruin the party in more ways than one. Why do they do this?

One, scammers have psychological needs. They could be looking to add some thrill to their otherwise mundane lives. If not, they want something they usually can’t have, like a semblance of control and power.

Two, some scammers don’t have other means of survival. They may be under extreme financial pressure (debt, loans, etc.) or lack opportunities to lead a crime-free life.

Three, scammers may be the way they are due to environmental and social influences, like peer pressure. Or, people in their circle often engage in such crimes to the point they’ve become desensitized.

And lastly, scammers often lack empathy and ethics. This may be due to childhood experiences and other forms of early exposure. If not, they can’t understand and relate to others (which sounds sad).

How Do Relationship Scams Work?

We can’t sketch the anatomy of a dating scam, so we’ll describe it for you instead.

First, scammers reach out to victims on relevant platforms. As the saying goes, you can’t find what you’re looking for if you’re searching for it in the wrong places. Dating site scammers either lurk on dating apps and sites or social media—any platform that people often use to find matches—for unsuspecting prey.

Second, they forge seemingly genuine connections with their preferred victims. They woo them through conversations, sweet messages, and every other trick in the book.

Third, scammers conjure up a crisis or problem that requires financial assistance. They do this when they’ve established trust between themselves and their victims. Once they’ve laid out their story, they claim to be in a pinch and ask for help in the form of money. Scammers can exploit this step multiple times, turning their victims into their ATMs.

Finally, scammers will leave their victims out to dry once they no longer find them useful. They look for others to fool and repeat their process, never getting enough of it.

Man reviewing his matches to protect himself from relationship scams

You can’t avoid relationship scams if you fail to see the signs.

Signs of a Scam

Scammers think ten (or more) steps ahead of their victims. After all, they’re expert manipulators.

But that doesn’t mean you can’t outsmart them. Improve your romance scam detection skills by watching out for these signs:

Inconsistent profiles

Sometimes, people overlook the tiniest details on social media and dating platforms. But even one little slip-up can be a dead giveaway of a match’s real identity. If a profile has too many inconsistencies to count, that’s a scammer waiting to pounce.

Quick confessions

Love and relationships take time to build. Feelings don’t grow on trees, so any early grand declaration of love warrants suspicion.

Scammers often quickly confess their “feelings” (yes, in quotes) and say sweet nothings to appear head over heels. Words aren’t as meaningful without action. Don’t be too quick to fall for their statements.

Financial requests

Does your match keep asking for money? Do their requests reek of desperation? Do they use every excuse in the book to beg for cash? If one (or worse, all three) apply, they’re a scammer trying to turn you into their personal bank account. Don’t wait for the day their words become threats.

Unrealistic stories

A romance scammer’s stories tend to be too good to be true. Their tales feel like soap operas with multiple plot holes and no resolutions. The more they tell, the more they contradict themselves. Ask them to fill in the details or for clarification to catch them in their web of lies.

Broken promises

At the risk of sounding cliché, we shouldn’t make promises only to break them. What’s the point?

You know things are bad when they always have convenient excuses to escape meetups or debt payments. Don’t wait until you start paying the price for that.

Conducting an Online Dating Check

There’s no romance scammer list you can refer to. Most are clever enough to cover their tracks and hide their identity. However, they can’t evade recognition forever.

Catch them in the act with a little test. Follow these instructions to be miles ahead of them.

#1: Don’t rule out possibilities.

You don’t know the person on the other side of the screen inside out. And with that, there’s always the possibility you’re interacting with a scammer. Go beyond face value and focus on the facts with every interaction.

#2: Cross-check their profiles.

There’s no denying a pretty or handsome face. The question is, is it theirs?

Do your homework and review all their profiles. Are their photos consistent? Do their bios clash across all their platforms? Put your detective hat on; don’t let any detail pass.

#3: Watch out for unusual requests.

Asking for money and/or personal information is among the ultimate dating red flags. Don’t fall for their trap, no matter how charismatic they are.

#4: Don’t shut others out.

Romance scammers try to isolate their victims to ensure their success. Don’t cut yourself off from the rest of the world—you’ll need their advice and, if worst comes to worst, help in your escape plan.

…

You may have heard your fair share of romance scammer stories. Perhaps they’re from strangers on the internet or close friends. Regardless, the important thing here is that you don’t become part of the victim statistics.

Fortunately, you don’t need to be a private investigator to master romance scam detection. These pointers should help you sharpen your senses.

Reference:

Lin-Fisher, Betty. 2025. “Romance Scammers Are Prowling This Valentine’s Day. How to Protect Yourself.” USA Today. https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/2025/02/12/valentines-day-romance-scams-what-to-do/78058000007/.