What You Should Know Before Breaking Up with a Narcissist
Christmas blues — sometimes you just can’t avoid them. The holidays are supposed to be a time of cheer, joy, and giving, but not everyone can be as jolly as St. Nick on Christmas Eve.
Breakups can happen at any time; they don’t wait for a season to finish. When a person has had enough, they will end the relationship instantly, no ifs or buts. Going through a breakup before the holidays is one of the most depressing experiences a person can go through.
Maybe a breakup before the holiday season would be a good idea, or perhaps it’s the worst decision you’ll make because being single at Christmas feels lonely.
Either way, someone has to decide whether the relationship is worth continuing. So, if your relationship is heading to the South Pole, do you choose to end it before, during, or after the holidays?
Should You Break Up During the Holidays?
Understandably, people can’t hold on to their feelings anymore and decide that it wouldn’t matter if they broke up during the holidays. Maybe some things are far more important than celebrating Christmas in a doomed relationship.
For them, spending Christmas alone is the least of their concerns; what matters is that they’re finally free, and end the year with no more burdens to carry—welcoming the new year with a clean slate.
However, there’s always a drawback. People hesitate to break up during the holidays because they feel guilty ending a relationship. The timing seems apathetic, and they feel like they’re the villain for ruining the holiday spirit.
Why You Should Break Up During the Holidays
When your relationship shows no signs of recovery, first seek out guidance from those who understand you to gain insight into whether your decision is wise. If they sympathize with what you’re experiencing, then that can be a factor in your decision—not a reason.
Holidays amplify emotions; staying for the sake of the holiday despite the relationship’s negative circumstances is seen as emotional dishonesty, which leads to more internal turmoil—losing not only the holiday spirit, but also affecting those around.
Remember, at the end of the day, this is your decision, and it’s not selfish—you’re trying to preserve your mental wellness. While it can be freeing to break up with your partner during the holidays, remember that Christmas is a sensitive season; you need to learn how to let someone down gently during these times.
Sometimes you need to decide what’s best for both of you. Christmas is the season of giving with love and joy; no one wants to celebrate the holidays with emotional stress.
Should You Break Up Before the Holidays?
Christmas is coming, and it’s obvious that you don’t want to put up a fake smile on the Eve. You’re not wrong to think that way—Christmas is supposed to be celebrated genuinely.
Breaking up before the holidays sounds like the kinder option, especially if you want to avoid creating an awkward or heavy atmosphere. However, some people feel it’s rude to end a relationship right before a hearty occasion.
Why You Should Break Up Before the Holidays
In every decision, there will be an emotional cost. Whether you choose to end it before, during, or after, one of these choices will hurt less—and that’s breaking up before the holiday season starts.
A breakup before the holidays releases tension and gives both of you a proper space to process your feelings. This prevents forced smiles, awkwardness, and passive-aggressive moments during Christmas Eve.
Yes, it can be lonely being single at Christmas, but it’s better to celebrate with your family and loved ones freely instead of carrying the weight of your sadness.
Timing Your Breakups Matters
Would it matter if you broke up with your partner before, during, or after the Holidays? Yes, it does. Depending on your relationship’s dynamic, one of these is considered the “kindest” time to end the relationship.
Breaking up before the holiday begins provides both of you with time, space, and emotional freedom from each other. However, you will be celebrating without each other, but at least it gives you more ample time to move on by celebrating with family and friends.
Breaking up during the holidays would seem insensitive and emotionally intense. But for others, this provides instant relief from their emotional burdens. It may create an awkward atmosphere, but it dies down once you set your mind on other things than the breakup.
Breaking up after the holidays avoids disrupting celebrations, but at the cost of delaying the breakup, leading both parties to prolonged emotional strain.
The Emotional Aftermath of Each Breakup
Your emotional aftermath will depend on the time you decide to break up with your partner. One may seem lighter than the other, but they all will hurt nonetheless; you’ll find yourself lonely, grieving, and in pain.
But your aftermath shouldn’t limit itself to negative outcomes; there are benefits to what has happened. You feel relieved after enduring what you went through, and you gain emotional clarity now that you’re no longer in survival mode.
Turn Your Christmas Blues to Christmas Cheers
Breakups suck — it’s a realization that circumstances never wait for a season to begin or end. But try not to sulk in your pain too long.
It’s okay to grieve the loss of your relationship; you should feel free to express your sadness. However, lingering too long in your grief can cause long-term emotional strain, making you feel lonelier.
The weight and loneliness of a breakup can drag you down, but your family and friends will understand that you’re going through a rough time—why not accept their invitation to spend time with them, right? Hence, Christmas is the perfect season to get your mind off things and lighten your load by focusing on celebrating the holidays with them.
If you want a healthy distraction from your breakup, why not do these?
- Participate in Christmas games and events
- Help prepare the feast
- Talk to your relatives and/or cousins
- Mingle with the people
- Watch a movie indoors with everyone
Turn Your Christmas Blues to Christmas Cheers
Breakups suck — it’s a realization that circumstances never wait for a season to begin or end. But try not to sulk in your pain too long.
It’s okay to grieve the loss of your relationship; you should feel free to express your sadness. However, lingering too long in your grief can cause long-term emotional strain, making you feel lonelier.
The weight and loneliness of a breakup can drag you down, but your family and friends will understand that you’re going through a rough time—why not accept their invitation to spend time with them, right? Hence, Christmas is the perfect season to get your mind off things and lighten your load by focusing on celebrating the holidays with them.
If you want a healthy distraction from your breakup, why not do these?
- Participate in Christmas games and events
- Help prepare the feast
- Talk to your relatives and/or cousins
- Mingle with the people
- Watch a movie indoors with everyone
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If you’re sensing your relationship is beyond saving, you must decide whether breaking up before, during, or after the holidays is wise. At the end of the day, it’s your call—your emotional well-being matters most.
Frequently Asked Questions
Breaking up before the holidays is generally considered kinder. It provides both parties space to process emotions and prevents the "emotional dishonesty" of faking happiness during celebrations. While being single at Christmas is difficult, it avoids prolonging internal turmoil and apathetic timing.
Focus on your emotional well-being by accepting invitations from family and friends. Engaging in festive activities like holiday games, preparing feasts, or watching movies with loved ones provides a healthy distraction and reminds you that you aren't truly alone during the season.
While it may feel like you’re the "villain," staying in a doomed relationship creates a heavy, passive-aggressive atmosphere that also affects those around you. Prioritizing your mental wellness and being genuine allows your family to support you through the transition.
Ending a relationship before January 1st allows you to start the year with a clean slate and no emotional burdens. It offers immediate relief from "survival mode" and provides the clarity needed to set healthy goals for the upcoming year.
References
Gould, Wendy R., and Bree Jenkins. n.d. “Ghosting: What It Means and How to Respond.” Verywell Mind. Accessed October 20, 2025. https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-ghosting-5071864.