How Scammers Use Psychology to Trick Scam Victims
Avoid becoming part of the growing number of Scam Victims. Learn how the mind games work.
Romance scams are a modern phenomenon, but scamming, in general, is a tale as old as time. One of the earliest recorded instances happened in 300 B.C. when a Greek merchant tried skipping his interest payments on a loan.
This suggests that technology isn’t the most powerful weapon in a scammer’s arsenal—it’s psychology. They use it to wrap scam Victims around their fingers. Some are so manipulative that they’ve gotten away with their actions undetected for a long time.
The Power of Psychology
Psychology is undoubtedly powerful. Scammers know this, so they use it as a tool for their machinations.
In a podcast with Feedzai, psychologist Patricia Harney recounts her experience as a scam victim.
Harney says she was returning from vacation when she got an unusual call from her “bank.” The caller asked for her name, which she confirmed, and notified her that her credit card had been compromised. They told her they’d issue her a new one and recited her bank account number.
Initially, she felt thankful to them for catching the fraud. But as it turns out, they were the fraudsters.
After she hung up, she checked her account and saw they had transferred $3,500 to another account.
With her knowledge of psychology and experience as a victim, Harney concluded that scammers usually employ the following two-step process to win over their victims:
Romance scam Victims tend to fall for false panic.
Step #1: Generate a sense of urgency.
Scammers often masquerade as experts or well-meaning individuals with credibility. Since society has conditioned us to trust and respect higher-ups, scammers’ jobs have gotten easier. What we think are respected figures are just scammers running bogus dating sites.
Cosplaying as authorities, they try to trigger a reaction out of their victims. The more emotional their victims get, the harder they’ll pull the strings.
Here are some emotions that scammers usually target to create a sense of urgency:
Fear and Anxiety
Harney says that generating anxiety is crucial in earning trust. The air of danger or loss (albeit fake) gives victims a reason to respond, giving scammers an opening.
For instance, scammers are well aware of men’s fear of scarcity. They use that and pitch opportunities like limited-time offers, sales, and discounts.
If not, they play the numbers game. They reveal the number of items left or how many people view their offers.
Scarcity can trigger your anxiety and survival instincts. Little do you know that this human feeling can lead to poor decisions.
Guilt or Hope
Unfortunately, many scam Victims on Facebook and other online platforms fall for this old trick.
Scammers present various offers. Once those catch victims’ attention, they pick up on their sense of obligation and manipulate it. They guilt-trip their victims or make them hopeful of accomplishing something.
Once scammers get the green light, they ask for more than they initially stated. And here’s something we should all remember: anything that’s “free” or “too good to be true” usually comes with a catch. Submitting something as minute as your phone number can make you vulnerable to criminal activity.
Shame
Embarrassment is a heavy feeling none of us likes to carry.
That’s how scammers pull people in: they know people hate shame, so they bank on that to keep victims’ mouths shut. The longer the silence, the better their odds of getting away scot-free. After all, no one wants to admit they’ve been duped by someone just dating for cash.
Don’t prove them right by keeping quiet. If you’re a scam victim, don’t just sit there and stay silent. Report them to the proper authorities and hold them accountable. Shame is a wasted feeling, especially on matters like this.
Step #2: Give them a way out.
Once they’ve got their victims in the lion’s den, scammers offer a ticket out of it. And the former takes that up as a response.
It’s human nature to accept assistance from helpful (but deceiving) people. Even if they know they're playing into the scammer's trap, the need for support can outweigh the potential consequences.
Hope is also to blame, as it makes victims think the help will be beneficial in the long term.
How Do Scams Impact Romance Scam Victims?
Unfortunately, scams don’t just make people lose money. They leave painful psychological effects in their wake as well. Both a victim’s wallet and mental health are left to dry.
Financial loss
Of all the effects listed, this one may be the most obvious. In 2023 alone, a quarter of the global population were cyber scam Victims, totaling a loss of more than $1 trillion. (2025)
Scammers’ prime target is money. They will drain whatever they can find, from life savings to pensions. Since they have little to no regard for their victims’ welfare, they’re shameless in carrying out their operations.
And with that, victims lose a significant degree of financial freedom. Once hacked, access to money becomes more difficult than usual.
Helplessness
Romance scammers tend to do things under the rug, covering their (digital) tracks to avoid detection. Some are so clever and experienced that they perform their crimes to their victims’ faces, and they don’t even realize it.
As a result, they cause victims to feel powerless. The way they covertly operate makes people question themselves and their intelligence. Who wouldn’t, especially if you’ve read all those guides on how to tell if someone is scamming you, only to be tricked right under your nose?
Their sense of safety also diminishes. They feel more vulnerable toward their surroundings, navigating the world with colder feet.
Emotional distress
Being scammed isn’t an experience people should take lightly. It brings a host of negative feelings, including (but not limited to) stress, anger, betrayal, and frustration. If left unaddressed, this distress can negatively affect victims’ overall well-being.
Others are deeply affected by being scammed and develop post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). They have nightmares about their experiences, triggering anxiety and other related symptoms. If you’re currently experiencing this, we highly encourage you to reach out to licensed professionals for help.
***
This look inside a scammer's playbook should keep you from unknowingly participating in their mind games and being added to the statistics of scam victims. It’s better to be overly protected than vulnerable to those vultures.
References:
Allstate Identity Protection. 2025. “The Psychology Behind Scams.” Allstate Identity Protection. https://www.allstateidentityprotection.com/content-hub/the-psychology-behind-scams.
Salomon, Sanjay. 2024. “The Psychological Impact of Scams.” Feddzai. https://www.feedzai.com/blog/the-psychological-impact-of-scams/#how-scammers-use-psychology-to-commit-authorized-fraud.
Cazanis, Alyxandra, Jao-Yue Carminati, Kimberly Chew, Cassandra Cross, Jennie Ponsford, and Kate Rachel Gould. 2025. “‘Falling into a Black Hole;: A Qualitative Exploration of the Lived Experiences of Cyberscam Victim-Survivors and Their Social Support Networks.” Victims & Offenders, (April), 1-20. https://doi.org/10.1080/15564886.2025.2481267.